Gunho! Panic for Love!
by Sketched Words
Summary: He never wanted a bodyguard, but at the insistence of friends he ordered the best. Expecting a meaty thug, instead he finds a shy blushing Hyuuga. Uchiha Sasuke meet your body guard, Hyuuga Hinata. AU [SasuxHina]
1. Making Arrangements

**I HAVE A WEIRD SENSE OF IRONY**

I'd just thought I'd let you know. Glad that's off my chest now so it should explain. . . well a lot actually.

**Disclaimer:** Not entirely sure what inspired this. I think it was a mix of _Skip Beat!_ V.6, a touch of _Full Metal Panic!_, and many spy/action-pack-thriller movies and a whole bunch of other fanficts. Sorry if the plot is clichéd and I probably should be updating other stories but this one wouldn't stop gnawing! Enjoy though!

**Summary: **

He never wanted a bodyguard, but at the insistence of friends he ordered the best. Expecting a meaty thug, instead he finds a shy blushing Hyuuga. Uchiha Sasuke meet your body guard, Hyuuga Hinata. AU [SasuxHina

-

**Chapter One**

_Making Arrangements_

-

**Frowning is bad for the health. Yet Smiling takes more muscles. **

-

Uchiha Sasuke frowned, staring at the news clip wrinkled in his hand.

'_Big-Time CEO Meets Untimely Death!'_

The bold letters screamed in his eyes, a secret message underneath. The message hidden beneath the underneath as his mentor would say.

He didn't even bother looking at the note attached to the news clip as they all said the same exact thing.

With a scowl, he tossed the paper into a draw filled with several similar news clips –still attached to an exact replica of the same message he'd been receiving in the mail for weeks now.

Sighing in annoyance, he fell into his chair and snagged the phone, pushing the dials with long-thin fingers.

Ring once.

Ring twice.

Ring thrice.

The phone picked up as a groggily voice echoed a half-minded "Hello?"

"Just received another one this morning," Sasuke said in a calm and serious greeting.

More muffled noises on the receiver's end before a clearer voice spoke.

"Shit Sasuke! How many does that make this week? Ten? Fifteen?"

"Twenty-five."

Sasuke's monotone answer did not respond well as more frustrated muffling noises were filtered through the phone.

"Sasuke, you know what Kakashi-sensei said if this continued on."

The warning tone in the other man's voice forced a tired sigh from Sasuke's lips.

"I know."

"Ok, then I'll start making the calls to arrange it."

"No."

"No? What do you mean no Sasuke-teme!?!? Kakashi-sensei made it extremely clear what was to be done if this kept going on!"

"I know."

"Then I'll start calling away."

"No."

"The hell!!"

"No. I'll make the calls. I don't trust your choice of . . . services."

"My choice of _services_!?!? Damn it Sasuke! You're being stalked! Someone out there doesn't like you and if we don't take these necessary actions something bad _will_ happen!"

In a seething but quiet voice Sasuke gripped the phone tighter.

"I know."

"You know? Is that all you can say Sasuke-teme! You may not think you need protection but there will come a time when you could be outnumbered or something! A bodyguard will help even out those odds!"

Growling Sasuke replied, "Fine then dobe. Make your damn calls!"

"I will!" the other receiver spat back with just as much venom.

Both proceeded to hang up simultaneously and seethe at either ends of the lines, trying to hide up the uneasiness of what another clip of a news article signified.

-

**Alone no one can hurt you. Alone no one can love you. Alone no one can save you.**

-

The oncoming twitch became unavoidable as Neji watched Hinata fret around the room.

The flowers she had brought were rearranged every other minute while his pillow would be fluffed every half a minute. She would straighten the sheets with such vigor that Neji was practically plastered to the whitewashed bed.

And the blinds.

No matter what she did, the blinds topped it all. There was either too much light or too little light shining through the hospital room he'd been situated in but the lights always seemed to make the cast wrapped around his right leg glare blindly at him –almost angrily.

Already the veins were popping out.

"Hinata."

His tone froze her actions and she pulled her fingers from the blinds to smile at her cousin.

"Yes Neji-niisan?"

"Stop it."

Giving a clueless innocent look, she tilted her head a bit to the side.

"Am I doing something wrong?"

Neji seethed knowing that she knew what was wrong under all that cuteness. It was hard saying anything to Hinata when she'd put up a front like that.

And so the battle began!

Neji's sulking frown VS. Hinata's cute innocent face

A basic battle of the wills but one look at Neji's blinding cast sent Hinata down another guilt trip. She sighed, slumping in her demeanor to sit on the edge of his bed.

With a low voice she apologized, "Sorry Neji-niisan. I'm just trying to make your stay at the hospital a little bit more comfortable. I'm to blame for that cast around your leg. It's my fault."

With another sigh, Neji propped himself up to rest against his multitude of pillows –courtesy of Hinata of course.

"Hinata-sama, we've already been through this. What happened is not your fault. It was an accident, so please do not worry yourself about it anymore."

Hinata sniffled, "B-but if I wasn't so clumsy we wouldn't have f-fallen down those stairs! I should be the one wi-with a cast not you!"

"No if you had fallen down those stairs and if I hadn't done anything about it, I doubt I'd still be alive today. Tenten for sure would have done me in," he said all this with a large gulp thinking about the weapon-shop owner.

Neji shivered internally.

Looking at him with those big and doe-like eyes Hinata stuttered, "R-really? Are you s-sure things are b-better this way?"

Neji nodded, not bothering at a weak attempt to joke around about Tenten's infamous aim. He just wasn't that type of guy but it seemed to cheer Hinata up with the slight motion of his head.

She smiled before throwing her arms around him for a hug.

"Thank you niisan!"

Neji attempted at a smile but it came out as a grimace. Once again Neji isn't one for touchy-feely acts of 'affection.' Besides, Hinata's weight seemed to put pressure on his cast, sending shots of pain through his already hurting leg.

In a tight voice he asked, "Hinata-sama you're on my cast."

Another thing Neji doesn't attempt exactly right –asking for help. But the message came loud and clear to Hinata who jumped like wild fire off Neji.

Horrified, Hinata began the endless cycle of fretting about every single little detail to better enhance Neji's comfort to the max –which had started the whole conversation in the first place.

Neji had been dropped back to square #1.

Groaning at the complexity of the situation, he almost cheered in relief when his mobile rang from the side table. Remember Neji does not execute actions of happiness that inquire a loud and boastful emotion.

He snatched it quickly as he saw Hinata turn speedily at the phone's ring tone –one specifically used for one purpose.

"Hyuuga Neji speaking, what's the job today?"

He listened to the instructions putting the details to memory before the phone was snatched from a very reproachful and frowning Hinata.

She turned her back to Neji who was in a moment of frazzled nerves. When Neji's nerves become frazzled his hair sadly turns frizzy. Already a coffee lock curled at its end.

He attempted to smother the curl down as Hinata ended her conversation happily with his mobile and turned to smile brightly at him.

"You won't be doing this assignment today Neji-niisan. I've told the company that I'll be your replacement for about a week so your leg will have time to heal. As of now you are officially on sick leave!"

From her dazzled words, the frizzing sporadically increased as Neji could feel his eyes pop out.

"You are substituting as a _bodyguard_ for me?"

"Yes!"

Neji did what no man should ever do unless at the rope's end of his wit. He promptly fainted into the mountain of pillows as the world spun out of balance and onto a whole new different course of insanity.

Hinata promptly fell into an overdrive of fretting all the while pushing her new assignment to the back of her mind.

_Uchiha Sasuke_

-

**The insanity of life is rarely seen by busybodies. Only when you take a moment are you called insane.**

-

At a glance, one would think the petite girl with her shoulder-length hair and shy smile was a rare sweet sunray to brighten up the gloom and doom of society.

No one –with few exceptions to those who knew her personally- would believe the girl was actually an expert at several different lethal fighting styles, had vast knowledge and professional skills using weaponry, or that hacking into security systems were just a playtime event she'd done as a child.

Such is the way of Hyuuga Hinata, heiress to the dysfunctional family widely known as Hyuuga.

And now before her body-length mirror, she stood in black slacks, white button-up blouse, with a loose black jacket, ready for her substitution job as a bodyguard.

She pulled her hair into a high ponytail and checked her pockets for the necessary weapons hidden all over her clothes. A smile at the mirror, a few touch ups on her hair, and finally Hinata was ready.

And thus the little bodyguard left with a skip in her walk to the address where her client would wait for her arrival.

-

**People are rarely morning people. **

-

Uchiha Sasuke scowled at his watch.

His bodyguard would be here any minute now. His mind paced at the thought of some meaty _thug_ following him around everywhere he went. That would be the end to his privacy.

And what if that thug could talk?

His mind paced faster at the awkward conversations he would be experiencing with a bald, steroid-pumped man that smelled purely of testosterone.

But that wasn't the worse of his thoughts.

What if the thug could talk insistently? Nonstop? Worse than . . . Sakura!?!?

His heart shivered at the nightmarish idea.

No, _no one_ could possibly talk faster or nonstop than Sakura.

At least he prayed to God that no one like that was about to step into his life with the ability to spit words out faster than a machine gun.

Thankfully his thought process stopped at a timid knock on his door.

Well, until he remembered _who_ stood on the other side of the door.

Right now only a thin piece of wood blocked him from the meaty thug of a bodyguard that was sure to be as dimwitted as the doorknob his hand was slowly turning.

The door's momentum slowed to an eternity as the figure in front of him was delayed to show.

But when it did fully swing open, a young woman bowed her head respectfully.

As she pulled her head up, a sunny smile played at her lips. His own lips flicked to smile in reply, till he remembered that Uchihas aren't suppose to smile at pretty girls.

Her voice tingled his ears as she spoke lightly, the smile still shinning brightly.

"Good morning Uchiha Sasuke-san. I, Hyuuga Hinata, am your bodyguard for the week."

Quickly Sasuke proceeded to shut the door on the poor girl's face.

-

**Who are you people?**

-

**A.N.:** Tada! Please proceed to place the fruit and vegetables in the box below as the author will not be able feel the rotten items through the computer screen.

Joking! I'm not much in the mood for rotten fruit or vegetables but please do review!

**I want to know why you people read this story!**

Tell me about your thoughts and everything as I am a lonely nobody whose complete obsession has forced another fanfict to be born into the world! That sounded weird didn't it?


	2. Proving the Inevitable

**MOST OF MY IDEAS COME RIGHT AS I'M ABOUT TO SLEEP. **

That statement should explain my random bouts of updating-ness and other random magic acts of disappearing! Or the random plot bunny out of the hat! Ta da!

**Disclaimer:** Hey I've been hearing that a lot of **PLAGIARISM**has been spreading like wildfire! You can prevent this! TELL THE AUTHOR IF IT'S HAPPENING! You'll save someone a hell of a lot of heartbreak if you do. Well that wasn't much as a disclaimer but yada yada yada it's all the same basic gist.

-

**Chapter Two**

_Proving the Inevitable _

-

**Everyone has thick skulls but eventually the message will come through. Even if I have to use a hammer, it'll come.**

-

Hinata blinked, quite confused at her current situation.

She fished through her pocket for the address Neji had reluctantly given her and double-checked the apartment door she was standing before now.

_Uchiha Sasuke- 2404 Apt. _

A glance at the closed door proved the same exact numbers and the last name _Uchiha_ on the side listed as the current resident. Timidly she knocked once more.

The door was abruptly wrenched open to reveal the same man from before. However as she was about to introduce herself he slammed the door in her face.

Again.

After blinking once more, the irritation of this _Uchiha Sasuke_ finally settled down. Huffing annoyingly she knocked louder on the door.

No one answered this time.

Frustrated she went around to the side of the building where the fire exits were situated. She stared at the ladders before sighing caustically at her current predicament. The _Uchiha Sasuke_'s living quarters were thankfully located at the end of the building next to the fire exit.

At that thought she jumped onto the bars and began to ascend to her employer's window.

-

**Stare into the eyes of your Prince Charming as he holds hands with Mr. Right.**

**-**

Sasuke let out a frustrated growl at the fifth ring which no one had answered.

He tapped his fingers in a drumming motion, looking suspiciously around for a petite woman with the biggest and most _beautiful_ eyes he'd ever seen.

_Wait. Beautiful? No, not beautiful. More like freakishly huge. Or like a ghost . . . yeah not beautiful but ghostly is more like her._

Yes, that's right. Uchiha Sasuke tends to deny feelings of warm fluffiness he may momentarily experience and push it so far off the cliff of who-gives-a-damn in his mind. Uchihas aren't supposed to remember anything 'special' about a girl anyway. Nor a guy since Uchihas aren't gay.

Well maybe a guy that could be a potential rival but that was beside the point.

His hands were gripping the receiver so tightly, the plastic almost tipped on the brink of breaking until a lethargic voice answered on the tenth ring.

"Naruto! Why the hell is a _girl_ standing outside my door claiming to be the bodyguard _you_ sent!?!?!!!"

Sasuke barked for an answer as the other stammered to rack his brain for a plausible explanation.

"A GI-GIRL!!! What the hell you talking about Sasuke-teme? Do you know what time it is?!!"

Sarcastically Sasuke spat, "Yeah its 9 o'clock in the morning so get your lazy ass up and get me an explanation!"

He abruptly slammed the phone down and glared around his apartment. Stalking over to his door, he peeked through the peephole to find the entrance empty.

Slightly puzzled he opened the door to step out and look for the young woman. Nowhere in sight did he catch a glimpse of her. Shrugging he closed and locked the door to wait by the phone.

His tracks stopped when someone stood successfully blocking his pathway.

Eyes narrowing at the same woman from outside he pointed, "You."

Her appearance looked the same though a bit unkempt with a dab of pink exertion painted on her cheeks.

However the scowl seemed slightly out of place on her usually friendly and well-mannered face. For Sasuke this was a first –especially for a man who had the women practically stalking him for a date.

With no proper idea on how to reply to her intrusion, Sasuke just scowled back.

"How did you get in here?" he demanded yet the tinge of curiosity could not be hidden so well.

A scowl glowering lightly she responded, "I scaled the fire escape and broke your window to get in. You were yelling in the phone too loudly to have heard me enter."

His eyebrows rose impressed though he dared not voice it out. Uchihas usually don't praise anyone unless done in such a grudgingly manner that the words said weren't even understood by the receiver of this rare praising moment.

A staring contest ensued, with the awkward silence building as each second ticked on. Neither knew what to say in a situation such as this.

Uchiha Sasuke had scarcely hired a bodyguard to expect a gunho ex-military con or more especially a buff meaty thug.

Hyuuga Hinata managed to place her cousin in the hospital and had volunteered to substitute as a replacement for his job as a bodyguard.

And yet things weren't going exactly to what either had planned.

To Hinata, Uchiha Sasuke was the exact definition of audaciousness.

To Sasuke, Hyuuga Hinata was the complete opposite to his definition of masculinity.

Completely different but with one question in mind.

_How _(the hell)_ was this suppose to work!?!?_

The tension broke at the shrilly cry of Sasuke's phone. He momentarily shot a look at Hinata to 'stay put' before snagging the phone, "Did you find anything?"

Nervous chuckling on Naruto's end before he cleared his non-existent cough to say, "Yeah and uh she's right Sasuke. Hyuuga Hinata is your bodyguard."

More tense silence from Sasuke's end –his hand shaking to grip the phone and the weight of Naruto's words.

"Uh. . . You still there Sasuke?" asked an extremely apprehensive Naruto.

_Deep breathes Uchiha. Deep breathe in. Deep breathe out._

"Yeah. I'm here."

"Ok but did you hear me right?"

Rigidly he answered, "Yes."

On the end of the line, Naruto felt chills at the tone of Sasuke's voice.

"Well uh yeah. Turns out she's substituting for the actual guy we hired since he's been put in the hospital recently. But she'll only be with you for a week –so try not to get too attached!" Naruto finished with such a teasing voice he could hear Sasuke shaking on the other end.

The immediate impulse was to throw the phone against the wall but Sasuke wasn't one to waste money on phones so opted to slam the receiver abruptly.

Turned out he'd been doing a lot of slamming lately.

A soft noticeable cough drew his attention back to an unwanted guest.

He glowered at her somewhat triumphant smile.

"Hyuuga Hinata."

She squeaked a "Yes," surprised at the tone of his voice.

"Follow me."

He took haughty steps to a room in the back and stopped at a desk to pull out the draw filled with death threats and suspicious news clips attached to it. He shoved the contents to the woman before slumping in the chair to watch her reaction.

Stunned at his brusque manner, Hinata placed the draw gently on the desk to shuffle through the numerous amounts of papers sticking at odd's ends.

She pulled one sheet out reading its contents in mind.

_Watch the clock for the time to click_

_Your step to miss or death be quick_

_The night consumes your eyes of hate_

_My eyes that watch and knock to wait_

_Your body be mine and mine alone_

_For pleasures, pains, and dreams I've known_

_In time to come you will be mine_

_No matter the screams or struggles, you're mine_

Hinata frowned and glanced at the news clip stapled to the back.

'_Missing Person Found Dead in River!'_

She felt the dread tremble within her but took up another poem to read.

_Blood, blood, blood, blood will not saturate my thirst_

_I'll have you, I'll have you, I'll have you, _

_Come, come, come, come to find me in the abyss of night_

_I'll have you, I'll have you, I'll have you, _

_Search, search, search, search over your shadow's shoulder_

_I'll have you, I'll have you, I'll have you, _

_Pound, pound, pound, pound the desk in frustration_

_I'll have you, I'll have you, I'll have you, _

_Trapped, trapped, trapped, trapped I have you now_

_You're mine, you're mine, you're mine_

She threw the poem onto the desk, not daring to read the others. Shaking she turned to Sasuke's smoldering eyes evaluating her. In the eyes of the client, her posture felt straight and as rigid as ice.

Quietly she asked, "Have you been getting these threats a lot lately?"

Hands still folded over his mouth he spoke, "I've received letters before –from obsessive _women_ – but none are quite like these. These," he motioned at the stack, "started arriving in my mail at the beginning of this week."

She nodded as she assembled the letters into a decent stack and pocketed it into her purse. Sasuke raised a questioning eyebrow but said nothing.

"I'll take some time to look over these letters later. Uchiha-san, do you know of anyone who would want to do something such as this?"

Sasuke paused to answer and when he did, his voice felt icy.

"No. No one alive that is."

Instinctively Hinata fell a step backward, staring questioningly into his dusky eyes.

Sasuke felt pinned under the woman's gaze. There was too much empathy, pity, and something else he didn't venture to name. He felt the frustration build at the way she looked at him. The words came out faster than he could stop, "Prove it."

Snapped out of stupor Hinata gave a befuddled look, "E-excuse me?"

He stood up, easily towering over her small form.

"Prove that you are worthy to be my bodyguard."

"I-I don't th-think that's a g-good id-idea!"

"No. Show your worth and fight me!"

The step she retreated back left a more noticeable distance between the two. However Sasuke easily devoured the distance to back her against the wall.

Shades of crimson bleed through his shadowed eyes as he repeated his demand.

"Fight me!"

He slammed his fist against the wall, easily bridging her in as he emphasized each word.

Hinata sank close against the wall, trying not to touch the unstable man. She closed her eyes trying to remember what Neji had warned her when she had accepted the job.

"_Hinata-sama, who I work for aren't people that can be won over so easily." _

_He turned away from the blinding curtains to convey a deeper meaning through their gaze._

"_Sometimes you will have to prove who you are. Through force, through words, it matters not. Show who Hyuuga Hinata is." _

_A twitch developed at the end of his lip that Hinata assumed was an attempt to smile. In the end she received a smirk for encouragement which she smiled happily at before dropping the curtain blinds to hug her cousin once more._

A confidence grew within Hinata and she forced her eyes opened to activate the rightful heirloom she'd inherited as a Hyuuga.

Her words came out as no louder than the whisper but the world froze at the implication.

"Fine. Let us fight Uchiha-san."

-

**Practice breathing regularly. The world tends to steal our breaths away in a multitude of different ways.**

-

They had cleared the living room together:

-Sasuke with a permanent smirk molded onto his face

-Hinata with a determined gleam shining in her eyes

Space opened, both rolled the sleeves of their shirts to a more comfortable way. Sasuke had contemplated taking the whole damn cloth off till he remembered that girls became quite vicious when _any_ skin was shown at all.

The smirk eased off his face as he turned to his opponent –never mind the constant spasm at the ends of his lips.

Hinata too turned fully prepare for hand-to-hand combat, a Hyuuga's specialty.

She bowed respectfully out of habit and fell into the familiar stance.

"Are you ready?"

Evaluating the eagerness in his eyes, Hinata took another deep breath and then nodded.

Sasuke didn't speak after that. He didn't have to either. Actions spoke louder than words.

The fist barely whizzed through the air before Hinata had dodged it to the side and jumped slightly away from the sweeping kick to follow. Using his slight opening, Hinata dove in for a hit before his large hand grabbed at her wrist to toss her over his shoulder.

Hinata spun in the air and at the last moment, pushed off the walls' surface to land gracefully several yards away.

Sasuke allowed his smirk play full out –usually intimidating his opponents.

_She's not too bad. However she'll never defeat me._

His body sped toward her ready to attack.

Blow after blow each party exchanged, some hitting others dodged. Sasuke usually wasn't one to beat on a girl but strength was strength.

However where Sasuke possessed strength, Hinata made up for in speed.

She easily danced out of his grip and the powerful blows he threw her way consequently pushed only through the atmosphere soaked in their sweat.

As the fight dragged on, Hinata felt her stamina slowly wane to its limit.

She'd have to end the fight soon if she expected to win. More energy was pushed towards her eyes for the veins to pulsate at her opponent. His cat-like movements became more defined and clearer than the speedy blurs before.

Not rethinking the potential chaos of her actions, Hinata pulled Sasuke's lithe form toward her and hooked his leg beneath him. She pushed her weight onto him to cause them both to fall backwards.

Nevertheless the Uchiha sees all and Sasuke saw through her moves. Using his last burst of energy, he switched their positions to put Hinata underneath him while he held her down.

His weight molded her body to the floor and he prepared to end the fight with his signature victory smirk when his body fell tense.

For the first time since he had opened his door, Sasuke finally found himself actually seeing just who this woman was.

Or rather _feeling _who she was.

Ears attuning to her laborious breathing, her skin felt smooth under his rough body. His eyes strayed from her sour eyes to her open-mouth plumped lips.

Suddenly those lips were his whole focus and felt his senses zooming on the way the velvet tissue parted and softened under such proximity. His face heated and he moved closer to the warmth.

His lips were a hairbreadth's from a soft kiss when Hinata leveled her leg to catapult him off her and flying straight into the door. His form instantly slumped from pain and deprivation of something he _did not_ want to understand.

The world had turned totally upside down in Uchiha Sasuke's point of view.

What made things go from bad to worse was when Hyuuga Hinata stepped around to the side of his defeated form to smile brightly at him.

"I win Uchiha-san."

-

**The most important prize of victory is definitely the gloating. **

-

**A.N:** What a way to fight, eh? I think I laugh at myself the most which is pretty funny if you ask me.

I've made this all so long (just a page or two actually) than my norm of writing pages for all your grateful encourages and praise! Thank you!

But please! Don't let the praise stop flowing! Worship me! MWUHAHAHA!

Joking! But please do review and thank you!


	3. Pride of the Needy

**IT LIVES!! THIS STORY STILL LIVES!!! **

I'm sorry I haven't updated this story in awhile. I've been too busy with school, reality, and other stories to relax and update this story and I appreciate your patience.

**Disclaimer: **I've had a few people mention a mistake in the last chapter of my usage of the Byakugan. And I'm sorry for the fluke! One day I'll change it… hopefully

Well without further ado, enjoy!

**-**

**Chapter Three**

_Pride of the Needy_

-

**What can be said of a man's fault? Why, his pride of course! There is nothing worse than a man whose pride has been shattered. Especially at the fault of a woman.**

**-**

Hinata tilted her head again, trying to catch the eye of her employer. He hadn't said much of anything ever since their little spar and she was getting a bit worried at the permanent pink tint dusting his pale cheek bones.

Not that Hinata noticed how well defined and strong his cheeks were. No, not at all.

She had thought that with her victory, his compliance and acceptance of her position would come easier. Instead the hopeless Uchiha turned icy cold and took to staring at the walls for far too long than what was considered normal.

Well, if you could call Uchiha Sasuke normal in the first place.

His dark abyss-blacked hair shined in sweat making the stray locks cling to his defined and toned face. Those hooded eyes constantly shifted from a bloody crimson hue to the darkness of the night. And even though she had probably caused him to pull a muscle from his back, he still moved with the grace of a restless cat.

But no, these facts were not seared into Hinata's mind compared to other girls whose sole life purpose was to catch the Uchiha in a tight wedding ring.

"Demo, Uchiha-san?" she awkwardly tried to break the silence.

He grunted, not moving from his staring contest with the wall.

"I'm going to… look around your apartment. Check for what security measurements that need to be taken, all right?"

He grunted again in what Hinata hoped was approval.

With a nervous look at the sullen Uchiha, she fidgeted a bow before scampering out of the room to do her job. The Uchiha's presence was just too… strange and forlorn at the moment.

Hinata was hired as a bodyguard, not his therapist.

Meanwhile, chaos wreaked havoc in Sasuke's mind.

Very much so as the monster in _Cloverfield_ demolished all of New York while most pedestrians were totally ignorant of what the hell it was doing there in the first place.

For Sasuke, the monster could be analogous with the thought of what the hell went wrong during that little spar. And he, Sasuke, on the verge of coming to terms with that knowledge would rather stay as a running pedestrian than accept the fact of the inevitable.

Uchihas are like that. Stubborn, arrogant, and most of all pig-headed.

Uchiha Sasuke just could not accept the fact that he had lost to a girl. And it was probably his own fault too. What was an even more shocking revelation was that Uchiha Sasuke, may in fact, be _attracted_ to this non-meaty thug type of bodyguard girl.

And though Sasuke was in fact **not gay**, much to the chagrin of many fellow males, he had not felt the need to date or worry about companionship when all girls did were bicker, chatter, and pester him.

However, he felt that this _Hyuuga Hinata_ did in fact annoy him she did not follow his normal guidelines of a normal girl. But then again, who had ever heard of a small girl acting as a bodyguard for a macho man like him?

That's right, none.

But then the fact hit him, that maybe it wouldn't be so bad having a Hyuuga as a bodyguard. Back in the old days before life had turned to meaningless soap operas and whatnots, the Hyuugas and Uchihas were surprisingly good friends. He was too young to remember but his mother had told him of a cute little Hyuuga girl he always used to play with.

His mind began to ponder the possibilities and ironic coincidences of the woman searching his other rooms was actually the little girl in the sunflower dress, hiding behind a wall but peeking out shyly to look at him.

He quickly threw that notion away.

As Uchiha Sasuke, he could not let petty childhood memories interfere with his plan to rid himself of the bodyguard next door.

Oh yes, the fun would definitely begin.

-

**The content of your pockets (or purse if you are that type of person) say so much more about you then the endless chatter emitting from your lips. No matter how perfect you say those lips are. **

**-**

Hinata frowned as she shoved more of the homicidal death threats into her purse.

Uchiha Sasuke had lied to her. These creepy poems and news clips had been coming to his house for weeks on end! The dates on the news clips proved her theory and her purse was sadly getting heavier with each new finding in the inspection of Uchiha Sasuke's desk.

She now realized that the draw he had shown her was the death threats of only this week.

Sighing, the thought also occurred that maybe Sasuke didn't trust her as one should trust a bodyguard.

Well, she'd have to change that soon if the two were to be stuck together for a week. Already their relationship was shaky at best. This was the first day of her first assignment and already her employer had taken to staring listlessly at the wall.

She shoved the last death threat into her purse and prayed the seams wouldn't burst from the overweight and then proceeded to tidy the desk up as if she had never been there. With the desk cleared, she went on to check out the locks on the windows, doors, and everything else in the room.

Her mind mentally noted down improvements and when she was finished with that, she headed towards his bedroom. As she was about to open its door, she heard Sasuke run swiftly from his wall to grip her hand in motion. She jumped a bit; startled at his speed and the amount of strength he was pressuring on her hand.

"U-Uchiha-san?"

He glared at her, "No. Not this room."

"B-but I have to check all the rooms. Safety precautions."

"This is my _bedroom_," he said emphasizing the last word.

Hinata only blinked and nodded slowly in confusion.

"I-I still have to check it."

He glared harder, trying to send a message to her with his angry stare. However it seemed that Hyuuga Hinata was oblivious to such fiddle things as death glares.

She moved to twist the doorknob with her other hand but he stopped her by tightening his own grip.

"Uchiha-san, please let go. I must do my job and check this room out."

"No. I don't want you in this room," he hissed.

Hinata's brow knotted in confusion at his persistence when a light bulb finally lit up in her mind.

"Ah! I think I understand now Uchiha-san!"

This comment threw Sasuke off and now it was his turn to bask in the darkness of puzzlement.

"Huh?"

"Is your room messy? Well then, I'll check this room out last to give you time to clean it up."

She took advantage of his slacking grip to free her hand from melding to the doorknob. With another polite bow she left the stupefied Uchiha at the door to check on the living room and kitchen.

Sasuke stood still for a moment and then slowly entered his room. His eyes stared deadpanned at the notes littering the floor and the maps pasted to his walls with strings and lines marked all across. He stepped across a few scrolls and his eyes drank in the sight of the dried stain of blood still crusting on his walls.

He was still tracking down _his_ progress and he couldn't have that happy-go-lucky bodyguard interfere. But then again, he couldn't let her know about his current obsession with revenge.

Yes, he definitely would have to clean.

Holding in a sigh, he went into the adjacent bathroom to find the bleach. He'd start with the bloody stain where the bastard had tried to draw a sword through him.

-

**Which would be harder to wash off? Wine or blood?**

**-**

Hinata had finished checking the small apartment two hours ago with exception to the Uchiha's room. He hadn't emerged from it yet and only barked at her to stay away whenever she knocked on the door. It was almost lunchtime and her stomach's grumbles were really starting to gnaw at her.

She took another glance at the closed door before looking at the homey kitchen. Maybe Sasuke wouldn't mind her cooking a little lunch for the two of them while he cleaned. She went to check on the fridge when she remembered that the Uchiha's kitchen was empty and bare of anything edible except for a can of _Crisco. _

She sighed and looked at the door once more, still closed and locked tight. She probably could have picked the lock opened but she respected the Uchiha's privacy to get his room in order.

Her stomach growled in protest.

A few more minutes of her angry stomach's moans and Hinata knew she couldn't take anymore. She cautiously went up to the door and timidly knocked. She heard loud crashing noises and a series of curse before the door was swung open to reveal a very messy Uchiha.

His hair strewed all over the place and his clothes were splotched in bleach but when she peeked behind him, the room looked spotless.

And quite normal.

"What? Did you need something?" snapped the Uchiha.

Hinata shook her head until her stomach answered for her in a whiny and long grumble. She watched in morbid embarrassment as the Uchiha rolled his eyes and moved to shut the door.

"Fine. We'll go out to eat. Just wait for me to change."

And he snubbed the door in her face.

Hinata wearily rubbed her sore nose staring at the door. It seemed that she'd been getting that door treatment the whole time with the Uchiha. At least he had complied to eating out without her having to say a single word.

She smiled at that and skipped off to find her black jacket and over-stuffed purse.

-

**Disappointment is something everyone eventually gets use to. **

**-**

The breeze blew warmly into the crisp afternoon air. Hinata, knowing nothing about the neighborhood, dutifully followed Uchiha Sasuke as he briskly walked through the crowded streets. Her eyes kept a sharp outlook for any suspicious or threatening persons and she couldn't get rid of this nagging feeling that someone was stalking them.

She hurried the Uchiha ahead and felt around in her jacket for the 9mm gun she had hidden.

Sasuke only glared at her pushing as he strolled down the streets looking for a decent restaurant. He was about to walk in to his regular Ichiraku's Ramen Stand but thought better of it incase the dobe would be out eating.

But when he felt Hinata's insistent pushing again, he growled and stomped into Ichiraku's Ramen Stand anyways.

He quickly sat down in his usual spot and ordered a plain miso ramen. From the corner of his eyes, he saw Hinata double glance around and casually scanned the current customer's before sitting a seat away from him.

He only snorted at her paranoia and proceeded to eat his ramen.

Hinata was fine with the façade of strangers between them. They had, after all, only met this morning. Besides it would be easier to catch their stalker if he thought Sasuke was alone. Softly, she loaded her gun with its magazine as she ordered a plain miso ramen too.

The two ate in a silence.

Hinata tensely fingering her gun.

Sasuke ignorantly eating his lunch.

And then a scream pierced the quietness with a high pitched squeal.

"AAAAIIEEEE!!! SAAAAASUUUKE-KUUUN!"

Several things immediately happened at once.

One, Sasuke stiffened praying to a God out there that it wasn't who he thought it was.

Two, a pink-haired woman jumped out of the shadows ready to capture Sasuke into her arms and into a blissful marriage and if not, then hopefully a sunny date.

Three, Hinata bolted straight up knocking down her bar stool seat and pinpointed the gun on a squealing Sakura shouting, "Freeze!"

The awkwardness immediately escalated.

"H-HEY! D-DON'T POINT THAT AT ME!" screamed Sakura.

Hinata only stared harder repeating her command, "Freeze! Or I'll shoot!"

Sasuke blinked at the scene occurring between the two women and was torn from telling Hinata to shoot the pink harpy or from laughing out loud at the whole chaos of the situation.

Instead he continued to peacefully eat his ramen. Uchihas never loose their cool.

"SA-SASUKE-KUN!!! HELP! SHE'S GOING TO SHOOT ME!! HELP ME!"

He sighed and looked at his gun-ho bodyguard. He waved a cavalier hand at Sakura saying, "She's not a threat to my life. Maybe to my sanity, but not to my life. You don't have to shoot her. Not this time, anyways."

Hinata glanced once more at the frantic woman and back at Sasuke before giving a reluctant nod and lowering her weapon. She did not, however, put the gun out of sight.

With the gun no longer pointed at her face, Sakura regained mobility to glomp onto Sasuke sobbing in tears. Sasuke tried pulling the woman off him and now felt a sudden regret in not having Hinata shoot her.

"Get off me!"

"Sasuke-kun! Sasuke-kun! I swear I saw my life flash before my eyes! My future too! We're meant to be! Together!! Sasuke-kun!!!!"

"AARGGH! Get off me woman!"

Seeing the familiarity the two people shared, Hinata happily hid her gun once more and sat down to finish her ramen. It was getting a little soggy but she still enjoyed it now that the atmosphere was no longer tense.

"Please Sasuke-kun! I could have lost my life back there! That crazy lady tried to kill me!!"

"Get off me!"

"I would have died crawling to you Sasuke-kun! You are my life! I love you!!!"

"Get off me! AARGH! Hyuuga! Help!"

Hinata looked at the couple and giggled at the Uchiha's desperate face. Taking pity, she stood up and tapped the woman on the back. When Sakura looked back though, she only screamed holding on tighter to Sasuke.

"YOU!!"

Hinata nervously fiddled with her fingers as she politely spoke, "Ah yes. I'm so very sorry for the misunderstanding. But I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to let him go."

"NEVER! SASUKE-KUN IS MINE!!"

"Uhm.. It's just that he's.. turning blue."

Sakura's iron gripped loosened at that and Sasuke coughed, standing up to drop Sakura onto the ground. He groaned, rotating his neck while softly cursing under his breath. He gave a thankful nod to Hinata as he dropped a few bills on the restaurant's counter. He turned to leave when Sakura stood planted in his pathway.

"Sasuke-kun! Who is that hussy?!?" she accused, pointing a finger at Hinata.

Hinata arched an eyebrow in confusion, pointing her own finger at herself.

"Me?"

"Yes you! You're the hussy! You almost killed me! And NOW you're trying to steal my Sasuke-kun!!!"

"N-N-No! It's not like that Miss – "

"I'm Haruno Sakura! But to you, I am the future Mrs. Uchiha Sasuke!"

"Wait Haruno-san I never – "

"No! If you must be formal, you must say Uchiha- "

"SHUT UP WOMEN!"

Both Sakura and Hinata turned to a huffing Sasuke blinking at his outburst.

"Sakura I've told you time after time, I will **never** marry you! Understand that! Now Hyuuga, let's go!"

He grabbed a baffled Hyuuga and dragged her to the exit when Sakura grabbed Hinata's other wrist.

"No Sasuke-kun! I won't let you leave with this hussy! Who is she anyways!?!!"

"Enough Sakura!"

"NO! I'm not letting you go until you tell me!"

A tug of war match ensued as both tried to drag Hinata apart by the arms. The poor little bodyguard jerked in their grips, seeing stars at the pain.

And when the pain became unbearable, Hinata exploded.

"S-Stop it!! You're both acting like children!!!"

The tugging stopped and Hinata took the opportunity to snatch her arms back to herself, rubbing the new bruises sullenly.

"Haruno-san, please understand that Uchiha-san does not want to associate with you at this time. And Uchiha-san, please tell Haruno-san our current relationship so her mind may be at peace."

Her eyes glared at the Uchiha who only glared harder in return.

"Sasuke-kun, who is she!!?"

"She's just my…"

He couldn't say it. No he couldn't say the word _bodyguard_ when the Hyuuga women was nothing like a bodyguard. Sure she could actually act as a bodyguard but the women looked nothing like a big meaty thug!

No! Not at all!

Uchihas were nothing without their pride. And at the moment, Sasuke's pride would not let the word of Hinata's profession come out into the open. He could feel the eyes of the whole restaurant zooming in on this commotion.

"You're what, Sasuke-kun?"

"Uchiha-san, please tell her. If not, then I would be happy to."

She gave a pause to let Sasuke continue but the Uchiha seemed to be trapped in his own inner turmoil. She turned and gave Sakura a sunny smile.

"I am Hyuuga Hinata, Uchiha-san's bodyg – "

"GIRLFRIEND! She's my eh girlfriend, Sakura."

Two simultaneous outbursts of confusion followed Sasuke's words breaking the sound barrier in a whole new matter.

And all this fuss for the sake of an Uchiha's pride. But the again, an Uchiha is nothing without his pride.

-

**Misunderstandings make the world go round. **

**-**

**A.N:** I thought that was a nice way to wrap things up. I actually have nothing really plotted down in ink for this story and am just letting the wind take me wherever it wants.

**POLL #1: **

Would you consider this story to be a crack fict? Or is the authoress just on crack?

Opinions, comments, maybe some flames, WHO CARES! EVERYTHING IS ACCEPTED IN A REVIEW!


	4. Teaser Chapter of Apologies

**A.N: **Like _Wedding Bells Black and Blue! _this story has been sadly neglected too. Even more so than the other one! I'm so sorry but I hope this teeny-weeny sneak peek can make the wait feel a little better! Please forgive me and do enjoy!

-

**Chapter Four**

_A Test of Sanity_

-

**In this world there is no such thing as the honest truth. If everyone told the honest truth, no one would ever come out of their homes again. **

**-**

Sakura eyed the so-called 'girlfriend' of her most beloved Uchiha Sasuke and couldn't help but want to rip out her pink hair. There was just no way this hussy could ever capture the cold and frosty heart of her future husband! No way in hell!!

She growled at the way Sasuke kept his hand casually around the hussy's waist.

Or the way the hussy sighed in bliss, resting her butt-ugly head against Sasuke's totally husky shoulder.

Or the way their eyes gazed deeply into one another sending secret messages of love.

Or the smiles exchanged – a smile that seemed to sculpt the perfect and delicate lips that Sakura had only dreamed of kissing and caressing.

Everything Sasuke and the hussy did as a couple sent her whole nerves on edge as she attempted to sip her iced lemon tea. Tea always seemed to calm her frazzled nerves. Her hands trembled in annoyance at the supposed 'giggling whispers' the couple exchanged as Sakura tried not to smash her glass against the table.

"So… Hitaka how long – "

"Erm it's Hinata, Haruno-san," interrupted the smiling bodyguard.

"Right, Hinata whatever. Anyways," Sakura paused for effect stirring her tea, "how _exactly_ did you two meet?"

-

**A.N:** I know! So short! XD I hope I can update this real soon too!! Forgive me!! I am unworthy of your patience and love!!


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